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Ah, spanking memories. Remember those spanking lines when you were a kid? I remember one time at summer camp, after losing at a sports game; I had to crawl between two lines of people, one on each side, so it was like crawling through a tunnel. As I did, I was spanked from both sides… Do you have similar memories? Or perhaps you were one of those devious kids who bratted your pretty baby sitter into spanking you. Although I was a good kid and would never have even thought of that, I know people who refined that technique into an art form. Either way, many people have happy spanking memories.
In any event, as much fun as childhood spanking memories can be (see my last blog), I’d like to focus this one on some of my adult spanking memories.
One of my first adult spanking memories comes from a time before I actually knew I was ‘into’ spanking. I was with my then boyfriend. He was giving me a hard time about something, I don’t remember what. We were walking up the steps to our apartment, when he made a rather snarky comment. Without even thinking, I hauled off and smacked his ass as hard as I could. He let out a yelp and cried, “that hurt. Why did you do that?” My response came as naturally as had the spank: “You’ve got to be kidding me — you were begging for that!”
A few years later, I was living in Los Angeles, and dating someone new. We were having sex one evening when he stopped everything, and very shyly asked if he could spank me. Being the open and adventurous type I am, I said, “sure!” So, as we began to get back into things, he started lightly tapping me on my bottom. I thought, “maybe he’s just getting started,” so I let it go on like that for a little bit. Finally, it occurred to me he might be afraid of hurting me, so I said, “you don’t have to be afraid; you won’t hurt me.” After a few more minutes of light tapping, I finally got frustrated enough to exclaim, “look, if you’re going to spank me, then SPANK me!” Although he picked up the pace a little, I decided it wasn’t worth pushing him, especially since I was having a good time in other ways. To me, that spanking memory always makes me laugh, and I like to share it at parties to demonstrate that one needs to at least be somewhat firm-handed.
While I’m not going to go into my first REAL spanking memory as a bottom (because it’s extremely sexual), I will share my first topping experience. Perhaps one day, if I’m feeling particularly bold I’ll share more details about my first bottoming experience. (People rarely believe it, but I’m really quite shy.)
My first spanking experience as a top occurred with yet another boyfriend. He was a spanker from way back, and desperately wanted me to spank him. I wanted to please him and although I wasn’t against spanking morally or in theory, in truth, I found I was a little afraid I might hurt him. I was scared that somehow I would unleash some rage monster inside of me, and that I would lose all control, and just start wailing away. And while he might have enjoyed this (okay — he would have), at that point in my life I was afraid of this part of myself. Fortunately, by starting out slowly and watching his reactions, I started to feel more comfortable with my ability to spank without letting out the beast within.
Of course then he started REALLY bratting and baiting me, so I decided not to hold back and give him exactly what he deserved. Ultimately, I realized I could let go and embrace the strong dominant part of myself, without becoming the Tasmanian Devil; and I felt empowered by the experience. As time went on and I gained additional experience as a top, I found myself developing more self-confidence — not only in spanking, but in asserting myself more often as an individual in my mainstream life.
Anyway, I’d love to hear your spanking memories — please feel free to share…